


Team Bonding Turned Gossip Session (Cause the Avengers are Teenagers)

by WinterIronCap



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Drinking Games, F/M, M/M, Mentions of Castration in Joking Manner, Mentions of Crossdressing, Mentions of Masturbation, Mentions of low refractory periods, Multi, Talks of Sex Toys, implied incestuous thoughts, mentions of edging, mentions of head butting pigeons, using weapons as toys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:42:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25135600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinterIronCap/pseuds/WinterIronCap
Summary: Fury is tired of the Avengers fighting in the battlefield. He forces them into a room so they learn to talk to each other, learn about each other. Or they will just kill each other. He doesn't care which comes first at this point.PS: No pigeons were hurt in the writing of this fic.
Relationships: Bruce Banner/Thor, Clint Barton/Natasha Romanov, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, James "Bucky" Barnes/Tony Stark, Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Comments: 31
Kudos: 333





	Team Bonding Turned Gossip Session (Cause the Avengers are Teenagers)

**Author's Note:**

> Beta read by the lovely Bucky Bear over at the Stuckony discord. Big big thanks to the members over there for all their help coming up with questions and listening to my wailing about this fic. Humungous thanks to resurrectedhippo for always putting up with me and encouraging me to finish this so that I can start the next fic!
> 
> Enjoy~!!

“I don’t see why this is a thing that needs to happen Sir!” Steve exclaimed, staring at the holo screen that showed Fury’s displeased face.

“Because Captain, I can’t have a group of heros at each other’s throats going out in the field.” Fury responded, tone saying he was close to snapping. “Last week's fight should have taken ten minutes tops but instead extended into four hours with the arguing and bitching at each other. Now you will all be locked in this room and you will learn to get along or kill each other. Whichever happens first I couldn’t care less at this point.”

With that the screen went black, leaving the reflection of Steve’s shocked face staring back at him. 

“Well...guess he ran away before we could ask why he has so much booze here?” Clint spoke up, looking up from the mini fridge. The room they were locked in was simple in design, the mini fridges hidden around the room, sunken sofas circled a glass table. Tony was sprawled on one side, facing Natasha and Sam. To his left sat their resident supersoldiers, Bucky pulling Steve down to sit beside him before he decided to punch the holo screen.

Thor took up one side of the circle to Tony’s right, Bruce sitting beside him. Clint joined Natasha and Sam after he finished his snooping, continuing to tell them what he had found. “One of the fridges has food and the other has water and soft drinks. All in all, not too bad for SHIELD hospitality. Also there is an excessive amount of coffee.”

“So how do they expect us to fix whatever they think is wrong with us?” Sam spoke up, looking around at the others. “I mean there was arguing during the last fight but I don’t get how locking us in the same room is going to fix that.”

“I think they expect us to be mature adults and talk it out.” Bruce supplied.

“Talk what out exactly?” Natasha questioned, a single eyebrow raised. “How is talking supposed to keep us from arguing?”

“I guess they want us to discuss why we argue?” Sam spoke up. “You know, get to know each other so the disagreements get cut down?”

“Yeah no, if we are going to do the whole sharing circle thing with us talking about our feelings then I am getting drunk.” Tony spoke up with disdain, standing to head to the booze fridge. He snorted in disgust at the cheap beer that filled the fridge, muttering about the cheap asses running SHIELD.

“Nothing new there then.” Steve mumbled, not realizing that everyone heard anyway. Tony pretended he didn’t hear, grabbing a handful of beers before sitting down again, setting them down on the table. Bruce and Natasha reached over, grabbing a few beers each and handing them out.

“I wasn’t suggesting we go around talking about feelings.” Sam informed them, taking a sip of his beer. “I was suggesting we get to know each other in an informal, friendly way.”

“What do you mean?” Bucky asked, tilting his head in Sam’s direction.

“We play a game. We’re stuck here anyway so we may as well play a game.” Sam suggested.

“So...your suggestion is we have a slumber party?” Clint perked up, eyes widening in excitement. “Cause if it is I am so down. Let’s do a team building exercise, I vote for Karaoke!” 

“How is that in any way team building?” Sam questioned, glaring at the blonde.

“Don’t care, I’ve been practicing my singing.” Clint responded, humming lightly before going straight into singing. “Let it go, let it go, can’t take it anYAHH-”

Clint’s screeching that was masquerading as singing was thankfully cut off by Natasha grabbing him in a choke hold. “Clint I swear to Thor, Loki and whatever other gods exist out there, just because I do not have my weapons does not mean I will not hesitate to castrate you.”

“Calm down with the castration threats Tash,” Tony drawled out, taking a lazy sip of beer. “You know you would miss that part of him if you got rid of it.”

“Wouldn’t cut off his dick Tony, I do get use out of that.” Natasha replied, flipping Clint onto the floor before leaning back into the couch, all without spilling a drop of her beer. “I’ll just cut off his balls.”

“I see why we need team building now.” Bruce spoke up, honestly worried that those two might be sleeping together after this. “Threats of castration aside, let’s just agree no to karaoke.”

“I heard of a Midguardian game,” Thor finally spoke up. “The lady Darcy called it charades?”

“Skip on that Point Break,” Tony spoke up, shooting Thor an apologetic smile. “Pretty sure there are at least three members here who will not be able to guess at charades due to them being behind on pop culture.”

“You don’t have to talk down to us you know.” Steve retorted, unable to hold himself back. “Just cause we are not all the way assimilated into this century doesn’t mean we can’t play the games it offers.”

“Calm down punk,” Bucky smacked Steve on the head, glaring at him. “He didn’t mean that, it’s true that any game to do with pop culture we will be unable to participate in. That’s just stating facts.”

“How about Never Have I Ever?” Natasha asked, an evil smirk aimed at the men around her.

“How about I spy?” Clint shot back.

“What are you, five?” Natasha retorted, shooting him a don’t-you-dare-cross-me look. “I vote Never Have I Ever.”

“How is this game played?” Thor questioned.

“We go around saying never have I ever and follow it by something we think no one in this group has done. If you’ve done it, you take a drink. If you haven’t you just pass.” Tony explained, tone bored.

“Sounds like a perfect team building game,” Sam spoke up. “Who wants to start?”

“I’ll start since I suggested it.” Natasha volunteered. “I’ll go easy on you. Never have I thought Loki was good looking.”

Natasha smirked as Bruce and Tony both raised their drinks, to the squawking of Clint. “Excuse you?”

“The man is all kinds of crazy but he is hot.” Bruce justified, shrugging helplessly. Everyone stared in shock as Thor raised his drink to take a sip.

“Point break? Do you not get the game?” Tony asked, blinking at the blonde in shock. “You’re supposed to only drink if you have thought that.”

“No, I understand,” Thor replied, relaxing back into the sofa. “He may be my brother but I do have eyes. He is hot as the good Doctor says.”

“Well,” Sam coughed, sitting up with a smile. “I certainly feel the team building happening. “Never have I ever thought about punching Director Fury in the face.”

As one, all the members took a sip of their beers. Steve sent Sam a reproachful look before taking a small sip. Sam raised an eyebrow at him, making him blush lightly.

“Just because I have thought of it doesn’t mean I’m happy about it.” Steve tried justifying.

“Sure Steve, sure.” Clint teased, nodding at Thor to continue the game.

“Hmm, never have I ever-” Thor trailed off, thinking for a minute. “Been kissed by someone of the same sex.”

Tilting his head at the god, Tony took a slow sip while looking at who else drank. Sam not drinking wasn’t that much of a surprise, Clint not drinking was shocking honestly. Natasha and the resident super soldiers drinking was expected, Bruce was a complete surprise.

“Really Brucie?” Tony teased gently. “I’m hurt, as my science brother I expected to know this about you.”

“I’m full of surprises Tony.” Bruce teased, smiling at the genius. “Now let’s see, never have I ever dressed in the opposite sex’s clothing.”

Tony gazed around, tipping his head to Clint when they both took a sip of beer. A sip which both men promptly snorted (Clint) or choked on (Tony) when they saw both Steve and Bucky raising their own beers.

“Seriously?” Clint exclaimed, rubbing his nose to ease the pain. 

“I would pay actual money to see that.” Tony gasped, desperately trying to get air into his lungs. He paused mid cough when he saw the sly smirk Bucky was sending him.

“No need for money doll,” He drawled, gazing right into Tony’s eyes. “All you gotta do is ask.”

Tony stared at him for a moment longer before blinking out of his daze. He shifted uncomfortably, coughing to hide his nervousness. “Uh, well my turn I guess. Never have I ever um, I don’t know. Oh! Never have I ever used my weapon as a sex toy!”

Looking around and ignoring Steve’s spluttering about inappropriate questions, Tony’s eyes locked on Thor as he slowly raised his bottle for a sip. 

“You have got to be kidding me! Seriously, you’ve used the hammer on someone?” Clint questioned, wide eyes locking onto Mjolnir.

“Well the handle.” Thore answered, completely unrepentant.

“Good god, of course the handle,” Clint responded. “Now the question is, did you use it on yourself or on someone else?”

“A god should not kiss and tell.” Thor responded, smiling at the archer.

“Bucky?!” an exclamation from Steve made everyone turn their attention to the super soldiers, watching as Bucky took a sip of his beer.

“What?” Bucky asked in confusion. “I have a metal arm.”

“A metal arm I built!” Tony burst out, eyes wide as he contemplated the super soldier. “One I regularly perform maintenance on!”

“Oh doll,” Bucky drawled out, smirking at Tony. “You forgot that I am left handed didn’t you?”

Natasha snorted at the look on Tony’s face, Sam smirking at Steve’s dumbfounded look. “The team building is skyrocketing here.” he said, motioning for Steve to go next.

“Never have I ever uh, jumped out of a plane?” Steve asked at the incredulous looks he was getting.

“Really punk?” Bucky teased. “Of all the questions to ask, you ask the one that if any of us asked, you would have to drink half the fridge?”

“What I couldn’t think of one!” Steve argued.

“With or without a parachute?” Bruce questioned.

“Doesn’t matter.” Clint answered instead. “He said jumped out, parachute is not a factor.”

Tony was the only one who didn’t drink, gaining shocked looks all around. “Why would I jump, I fly out of planes.”

“Well,” Natasha smiled at Steve. “Congrats Steve, you’re the first one to ask a question where Tony hasn’t had to drink.”

“Never have I ever,” Bucky spoke up, staring at Tony as he spoke. “Had serious romantic feeling for a team member.”

“Is it just me or are we getting into strange territory?” Bruce whispered to Thor, watching the intense eye contact happening across from him. 

“Who cares, just drink.” Thor responded, taking a sip for himself as Natasha and Clint did. 

Bruce took a sip himself as Steve took a tentative sip. Bucky was staring at Tony with a challenge in his eyes now. Slowly Tony brought his bottle to his lips, taking a short sip while staring Bucky down with defiance in his eyes.

Clearing his throat, Clint brought everyone’s attention to him, breaking the moment between the super soldier and genius. “My turn, never have I ever kissed someone on this team.”

“What the hell is with this game Jesus Christ.” Sam groaned. “This is how you all want to get to know each other?!”

Tony snorted as he watched the others drinking, only him and Sam not drinking. “Well that’s a surprise.” Steve mused with amusement. “I thought you would be the first to drink Tony.”

“You think about me kissing you often Cap?” Tony shot back, amused at Steve’s blush. “Contrary to your belief I don’t go around kissing you guys.”

The resulting silence was broken by Natasha taking her turn. “Never have I ever fallen in love at first sight.”

No one moved for a full minute before Tony raised his beer, taking a slow sip. “Really Tony?” Clint questioned.

“Did you ever tell them?” Sam asked Tony before he could reply to Clint.

Tony twisted the bottle in his hands, staring at it with a far away look. A few moments later he looked up at Sam. “No.”

No one said anything for a few minutes, staring at Tony, expecting him to expand on his answer but he ignored their stares, looking at Sam expectantly. Finally Sam took the hint and decided to play his turn.

“Never have I ever,” Sam started, still wondering about Tony’s answer. “Caught my parents having sex.”

“Gross dude!” Clint groaned, slightly horrified when Thor drank and Bucky followed.

“Seriously?” Bruce asked, gaze trained on Bucky.

“Some memories I wish never came back, let's keep it at that.” Bucky responded, shuddering in ill concealed disgust.

“Tony?” Natasha questioned, eyes trained on the billionaire. “You never saw the legendary Maria and Howard Stark getting their dirty on?”

“That’s a whole other question Tash,” Tony replied, slowly meeting her eyes. “Wing boy asked if I saw my parents having sex, I was lucky if I saw them in the same room during my life. Them in bed on the other hand, let’s just say I’m glad I got sent to boarding school after all the times I caught Howard Stark in bed with someone.”

“You could at least call him dad you know.” Steve advised, not knowing why Natasha was glaring at him.

“He would have had to acknowledge the fact that I was his son for me to call him dad.” Tony snapped, unable to deal with Steve’s attitude anymore.

“Okay!” Bruce called out, trying to stop the fight from exploding. “Let’s just agree to disagree, obviously this is a point of contention. Thor, your turn.”

“Of course,” Thor’s voice boomed out, trying to dispel the tension. “Never have I ever had a threesome.”

Everyone expects Tony to raise his drink, Natasha too. Clint was surprising but the true shock was when Sam raised his drink. “Sam?”

“What?” Sam looked at them calmly, daring them to ask anymore.

“Should I drink if I’ve thought about it?” Bucky spoke up, taking the attention away from Sam. “Cause there’s always a threesome going on in my dreams.”

“Dude.” Clint whispered into the shocked silence. “Literally more than I ever wanted to know about you.”

“Please tell me one of these three is Steve.” Natasha smirked.

“Of course one of them is Steve.” Bucky responded, eyes tracing over Tony’s face.

Taking his own eyes off Tony, Steve focused on Bruce, motioning for him to continue the game. No one noticed the glint in Natasha’s eyes as she caught the looks passing between the super soldiers and the resident genius.

“Never have I ever said the wrong name in bed.” Bruce called out, watching as Tony, Steve and Bucky each took a sip. “Really, you two?”

“I thought you’re each other's long lost loves, how could you say the wrong name?” Sam questioned.

“Our third in our threesome fantasy.” Bucky stated simply, ignoring the incredulous looks being shot at him as his gaze landed on Tony.

Tony wasn’t looking at the soldiers thus he missed the look but caught the plural that Bucky used. “Our?”

“Bucky and I share feelings for the third person.” Steve explained. “Shared feelings and fantasies.”

Shocked silence met his declaration, everyone staring between the two super soldiers. Tony finally saw Bucky’s gaze on him, now with the addition of Steve’s eyes on him too. His breath hitched, not understanding why the heated gazes were aimed at him.

“Tony,” Sam called out, catching the looks between the three. “It’s your turn.”

“Right, yeah,” Tony cleared his throat, turning his gaze away from the soldiers. “Uh never have I ever uh, punched a pigeon with my face.”

“What in the hell?” Sam exclaimed, looking even more shocked when Clint and Bucky took a sip. 

“What, they get in the way when I’m aiming and I hold a bow and arrow,” Clint shrugged. “I have to head butt them.”

“Same deal here,” Bucky spoke up. “I’m a sniper, can’t wave them away.”

“Steve?!” Natasha exclaimed when Steve took a sip as well.

“What?” Steve questioned, looking honest to god curious. “I couldn’t wave them away and may have head butted one while falling out of a plane.”

“What I am shocked at is that Tony or Thor are not drinking and they are actually in the air while our three ground bound members are the ones attacking pigeons.”

“Well I may have swallowed some bird feathers but never actually head butted one.” Thor volunteered.

Steve honestly had no response for that so he just decided to move on and take his turn. “Never have I ever wished I was the opposite gender.”

Everyone looked around at each other before staring in morbid fascination as Sam took a slow drink. “I want to ask so many questions but I really don’t want to hear the answers.” Clint spoke slowly, staring at Sam before shaking his head to clear it. “Forget it, Bucky your turn.”

“Never have I ever,” Bucky drawled out. “Willingly been in handcuffs.”

Clint was the only who drank before Steve slowly raised his bottle for a quick sip. Bucky’s eyes trailed over to Tony, a slow smirk spreading over his face. “Really doll? You never willingly had handcuffs put on you?”

Tony averted his eyes, not dignifying that with an answer. 

“I feel like I know more about some of you than I ever wanted to.” Clint spoke up. “Let’s play something else, how about would you rather?”

“Oh I know this Midguardian game.” Thor spoke up, voice full of excitement.

“I do too!” Steve exclaimed, face lighting up in excitement.

“Well I don’t.” Sam shot back.

“You’re presented with two scenarios, you pick your preference and then explain why.” Natasha simplified.

“Oh I wanna go first! Bruce! Would you rather read erotica or watch erotica?” Clint questioned.

“For god’s sake why me.” Bruce exclaimed in annoyance before sighing and answering anyway. “Definitely read, watching erotica will never measure up to my imagination. Also videos are so inaccurate.”

“Like written is so much more realistic.” Clint quipped.

“But imagining it I can make it more realistic.” Bruce explained. “Now uh, Sam. Would you rather speak to animals or know other people’s thoughts?”

“Considering the amount of swearing pigeons I just found out I would have to listen to, I’m going to say listen to y’alls thoughts. Though that’s not looking to be the best option either.” Sam grumbled. “Natasha, would you rather tell everyone of your guilty pleasures or never partake in any of your guilty pleasures ever again?”

“Fuck, you don’t make this easy do you?” Natasha asked, running her hand through her hair. “Tell everyone of my guilty pleasures.”

“Seriously? Never imagined you would share something that personal.” Tony mused.

“Well I figure even if I tell you, I can make you keep quiet about it. You will force yourself to forget that I ever told you.” Natasha smirked back. “Let’s see...Steve, would you rather grant everyone’s sexual wishes or have all your sexual wishes granted?”

“Excuse me?” Steve blushed, unable to control it. “I-I don’t want to answer that.”

“You gotta love.” Bucky told him, lips quirked. “Them’s the rules.”

“Well I would want to grant the sexual wishes of my partner, or partners if I could build up the nerve to talk to the one in my dreams properly.” Steve slowly responded, eyes glazing as he talked about the person he dreamed of. “But I don’t care about my sexual wishes, as long as the people I’m with are happy.”

Steve cleared his throat uncomfortably at the way everyone was staring at him. “Uh so, um Thor, would you rather live without youtube or without facebook?” 

“Oh very crafty Captain!” Thor’s voice boomed out. “I do enjoy keeping in touch with all of you but I shall have to say Facebook. I can’t give up my cooking shows, how the chef’s make those perfect pot roasts all the time.”

“Thor,” Tony called out. “You can’t cook worth shit.”

“Tony, just because I cannot cook does not mean I don’t enjoy watching those who can.” Thor replied.

“Whatever makes you happy, big guy.” Tony replied.

“Very well, Bucky!” Thor called out. “Would you rather a date at a fancy expensive restaurant or street food at the fair?”

“Hmm as long as I’m with the people I love then I don’t care, street food is fine for me.” Bucky replied. “Now my turn. Tony, would you rather be stuck in traffic for two hours or receive a grueling blowjob for six hours without a climax?”

Unfortunately Tony had just drank the last of his beer when Bucky asked his question. As he was spitting it out and coughing to clear his airway, Steve moved over to gently run a hand across his back to help him through it. 

“What in the name of hell is wrong with you?” Tony yelled out, wide eyed stare aimed at Bucky. “Who asks something like that?”

“Someone who’s interested in the answer very very much.” Bucky answered simply, blinking innocently at Tony.

Lips pressed firmly together, Tony shook his head in denial, refusing to answer. “Come on doll, you gotta answer.” Bucky smirked.

“Yeah Tony,” Clint piped up. “If you refuse to answer, the punishment is that you have to answer a question from each of us, no refusing.”

“Fine I’ll answer.” Tony grumbled, unconsciously leaning back into Steve’s hand. Arms crossed in anger, he met Bucky’s gaze with glaring eyes. “I hate traffic. Whole reason I built a flying suit is to get rid of traffic. I would rather the six hour edging, never gone for quite that long before but I’ve had experience with it.”

A slow, genuine smile spread across Bucky’s face, eyes warming. “Thank you, Tony.”

“Good to know.” murmured Steve, thinking that Tony had not heard him. “Now we have a starting point.”

Tony slowly turned his head, giving Steve an incredulous look. His attention was diverted by Natasha gently prompting him to take his turn. “B-Bucky, uhm would you rather have your hair pulled or be slapped on the face?”

“Can you specify doll?” Bucky shot back instantly. “Is this in general or specifically during sex?”

“What? No, just answer the question!” Tony shot back, flustered but not denying that he wanted to know about Bucky’s sex life.

“I’ll tell you both cause I’m feeling generous.” Bucky leaned forward, staring right at Tony as he answered. “Hair pulling is fine for me, both inside and outside of bed. But if the people I am thinking of are in bed with me, a little slapping is hot too. One of them is already in my bed, the other is there in my dreams.”

Tony swallowed nervously, feeling Bucky’s heated gaze tracing his features. He snapped out of his trance, breaking his focus from Bucky when Clint’s voice spoke up. “Hey Tasha, would you rather play never have I ever or play would you rather?” 

“Definitely would you rather, this is getting hot.” Tasha answered, lazily fanning her face to make her point. “Thor, would you rather hug a panda or hug a polar bear?”

“Oh a polar bear for sure!” Thor’s voice boomed. “Panda’s are cute and cuddly but polar bears will at least put up a challenge, you need to earn their hugs.”

“Or you could, you know, not be mauled in order to get some cuddles in.” Bruce muttered.

“All in the name of love,” Thor responded. “Tell me Bruce, would you rather be a linguistic genius, able to speak any language, or an artistic genius, in all the arts?”

“Hmm, probably linguistic. I feel like I would enjoy understanding more and reading in various languages.” Bruce explained. “Being limited to one language seems to be a waste when I have the option to learn so much.”

“Hmm I always did like my geniuses interested in science.” Thor responded, not noticing the flash in Bucky’s eyes or the clenching of Steve’s fist in his lap. “I find it admirable that you would choose to expand your knowledge above all else.”

Smiling at the god, Bruce moved on with the questions. “Hey Sam, would you rather have to report to Colonel Rhodes or would you rather give a report to Miss Potts?”

“Oh my god no,” Sam whined. “Why Bruce why, do you hate me that much?”

“Eh it’s getting to know each other better.” Bruce smiled innocently. “I want to know who you would rather deal with.”

“More like who I would rather kill me.” Sam deadpanned. “I think Miss Potts. Colonel Rhodes would torture me if I messed up, Miss Potts I’m sure I could never disappoint enough to warrant her to threaten me the way she threatens Tony. Uh Bucky, would you rather bottom from the top or top from the bottom?”

“Why do we all seem to want to know each others sex lives, especially the two super soldiers?” Clint wondered.

“Cause it’s get to know your teammates, and you know that saying, you are who you sleep with.” Natasha answered, earning a look from Tony.

“That is so not the saying.” he grumbled.

“It does fit, doll.” Bucky eased him down, gently patting his shoulder. “Regardless of the fact that I don’t know what bottoming from the top means, I find that it really doesn’t matter. I bottom just as frequently as I top.”

“Jesus christ,” Tony sighed, burying his head in his hands. “Didn’t need to know that.”

“Come on Tony, that could be useful information to know.” Steve spoke up, stroking Tony’s back calmingly again. “You never know when you may need to know something like that about us.”

Giving Steve a side eyed look, Tony focused again when Bucky started speaking. “Steve, would you rather I ask out the person we want as our third or would you rather you ask him?”

“I would rather he figure it out himself that we love him,” Steve commented warily. “But seeing as I can’t open my mouth without offending him, maybe you should be taking point on this.”

Seeing Bucky nod out of the corner of his eye, Steve smiled as his gaze settled on Tony. “Tony, would you rather use sex toys on your partners or would you rather them be used on you?”

“How are you saying that without blushing?” Clint quipped, nonetheless interested in the answer.

“How indeed,” Tony mused, shooting a smirk at Steve. “Considering I’m a perpetual bottom, I would say used on me.”

“Hold up!”

“Whoa.”

“Wait just one damned second!”

Clint, Bruce and Sam exclaimed respectively.

“What?” Tony jumped, not having expected them to shout so loud.

“What do you mean ‘perpetual bottom?’” Clint questioned.

“It means I enjoy bottoming?” Tony shot him a weird look, not knowing where all this confusion came from. “Anyway, Clint, would you rather sleep with Bucky or sleep with Steve.”

“Tony jesus christ,” Clint groaned, head buried in his hands. Natasha patted his back mock sympathetically. “Why, why would you ask that?!”

“Come on Clint,” Bucky grinned evilly. “Answer the question.”

“Honestly Clint,” Steve smiled angelically. “It’s not that hard of a question.”

“No this is the definition of a hard question,” Clint responded, not being fooled by Steve’s innocent expression. “I’m stuck between a hard place and a harder place here. If I answer, I risk the other killing me or your third shooting me. If I don’t, I’m a wimp who tapped out of the game.”

“How about we change the game?” Sam suggested, trying to hold the peace. “It seems this game is turning into let’s get to know each other through sex preferences.”

“What did you have in mind?” Bruce spoke up, knowing that certain members seemed to be more focused on sex than others.

“Truth or dare?” Sam suggested hesitantly.

“What dare can you think of that we could do while stuck in this room?” Natasha questioned skeptically.

“How about truth or strip?” Bucky suggested, grinning slyly.

“How is that moving away from getting to know each other through sex talk?” Sam argued.

“It’s not. Just give up, we want to learn about each other this way, at least we are not arguing.” Bucky replied simply.

“Fine, let’s do this.” Clint decided, not wanting to go back to the question of doom. “Sam, would you rather have sex in a pool, a hot tub or a shower.”

“Good god it’s like this team is made up of a bunch of teenagers. Horny teenagers.” Sam sighed. “Really would rather none of those, pools are gross for sex, it would be like having sex in a toilet bowl. A hot tub is not recommended to have sex in and shower sex is an excercise in itself. Bruce, what’s the strangest thing that has ever turned you on?”

Blushing lightly, Bruce cleared his throat. “Yah no, stripping for me.” Calmly taking off his jacket, he readjusted his glasses before focusing on Clint. “Clint, what’s your biggest sex fantasy?”

“Oh that’s easy.” Clint brightened up. “It would be to see Steve and Bucky with their third. That’s one threesome I want to watch, even though I have no voyeuristic tendencies but man that would be hot. Tash, who here are you most jealous of?”

“Tony.” Natasha spoke up promptly and with no hesitation. She ignored Tony’s wide eyed look. “Thor-”

“Wait one damned second!” Tony interrupted her. “You can’t just say something like that and move on! Why the hell are you jealous of me?”

“You’re the only one here making amends of their own will.” She explained, her gaze lowered. “You could have stayed the same after Afghanistan, you could have kept making weapons. We all have reasons for being here but you’re the only one who actively volunteered to fix your mistakes. The only one who didn’t need to change but chose to, to own up to your mistakes.”

A pause before Tony’s voice spoke up. “You’re wrong.” Just those two words, he said nothing else but suddenly the weight that had seemed to come off his shoulders as the day wore on resettled. He bowed his head, leaning away from Steve’s hand now and not looking at anyone.

Clearing her throat, Natasha shifted awkwardly before continuing the game. “Thor, what’s uh, what’s your most recent sexual experience.”

“It was with my hammer.” Thor replied promptly, no shame or embarrassment. “The person I am courting was there as well, watching.”

“Someone watched you masturbate with your hammer?” Clint gasped, unable to comprehend what he was being told.

“I am courting them, therefore they should know about all my habits.” Thor shrugged. Everyone was so focused on Thor in wonder, they all missed Bruce’s light blush. “Now Steven! What is the most you have ever orgasmed in a single day?”

Face flaming instantly, Steve avoided everyone’s eyes. “N...nine.”

“What in the name of hell, how are you still alive?” Sam exclaimed in shock.

“It was, uh it was because of the third person we want.” Steve grumbled. “He walked around with skin tight clothing and then short shorts and then…we caught him stepping out of the shower looking all wet and hot and...nine rounds later and it wasn’t enough.” Steve was trying so hard to avoid everyone's eyes, he didn’t see Tony’s eyes staring at him in confused wonder. 

Grinning smugly, Bucky moved over to sit beside Steve, gently ruffling his hair in comfort. “That was a good night punk. Now ask your question.”

“Uh Tony, if you could only pick one person to kiss on the team for the rest of your life, who would it be?” Steve asked the genius.

Wordlessly, Tony kept staring at him for a moment before silently taking off his hoodie, staying in his tank top only. He kept a close eye on Steve and Bucky, watching as their eyes heated and trailed over his exposed skin. “Uh Clint, do you know who Bucky and Steve’s dream third is?”

“I suspect.” Clint responded, Natasha volunteering that she suspected as well. “Now Sammy, what’s your biggest pet peeve?”

“People calling me Sammy.” Sam deadpanned, glaring at the blond. “Thor, your booming voice is fake isn’t it? You know how to hold a conversation in normal decibels, you just choose not to.”

“Yes, I have expectations I must live up to as a god.” Thor boomed, just to annoy Sam. “Tony, who is the person who you fell in love with at first sight?”

Staring steadily at Thor, ignoring the heated glares coming from Steve and Bucky, Tony silently took off his tank top. Steve’s gasp behind him wasn’t masked by the sound of Bucky’s moan. Turning his head slowly to face the soldiers, he spoke his question in a quiet tone. “Bucky, this third you keep talking about is he-is he in this room right now?”

Bucky smirked, knowing that Tony now either knew or suspected correctly. “Yes doll, he sure is.”

Steve smiled, catching on. He slowly ran his finger tips down Tony’s bare arm, raising goosebumps on the genius’s body. He trailed his fingers down, finishing the movement by holding out his hand to Tony, waiting for him to make the first move. Watching as Tony gulped in apprehension, a grin split across his face as Tony reached out his hand, lacing their fingers together.

“Tony,” Bucky whispered, seemingly forgetting the others in the room. “Do you want this, with us, both of us?”

Meeting blue grey eyes, Tony reached out his own hand to grasp Bucky’s. “We have to talk, for sure we have to and God knows if this will work but...I want to try. If you’re willing to try, so am I.”

“Oh sweet thing, we are more than willing to try.” Bucky spoke up softly, metal fingers tracing Tony’s cheek. 

“Hey love birds,” Natasha’s voice spoke up, bringing their attention to their surroundings. Looking around that saw that there was no one in the room except Natasha standing at the now open door. “Glad you figured yourselves out, let’s get out of here.”

Standing up to follow her out of the room, Steve mused with amusement, fingers still laced with Tony’s. “Gotta say, I feel a whole lot closer to the team.”


End file.
